Inspiration!

Famed baseball coach Yogi Berra once said “100% of inspiration is 90% perspiration.” Yogi Berra didn’t actually say that, but it sure sounds like something he would say. And you can too. Confused? Of course you are. That’s because everything you’ve ever learned about inspiring people is wrong.

Your team looks up to you, not just because you’ve put yourself on a pedestal of your own making. They look up to you because they don’t just want to be inspired, they need to be inspired, they yearn for nuggets of wisdom. They look up your metaphorical, and in the case of female, cross-dressing and Scottish managers, literal, skirt hoping to find something they can grasp. So as they gaze up at your nuggets dangling just out of reach, read the following tips and inspire them as you’ve never done before.

Lesson One: Be spontaneous and relatable. Nothing says inspiring like off-the-cuff comments that show you not only understand what they’re going through, but that you also have it much worse. Why are ad hoc comments so effective? Because they come from the heart. And not just any heart, your heart. When someone says they’re overworked tell them it could be worse, they could have to deal with your tasks. If they complain about a late night meeting say you have one even later. Only when they truly understand how much harder your job is, because you repeatedly tell them, will they be inspired to amazing new heights. As they try, and fail, to contain their new found inspiring thoughts be comforted that the tears they cry are simply emotions too complex to express in words.

Lesson Two: Never forget the human body evolved over many years to respond to low level chronic stress. Use nature’s tools to your advantage by constantly reminding your employees how much work has to be accomplished and how little time there is left to complete it. That daily boost of cortisol mixing with their anti-depressants and caffeine will carry your employees along like a feather in a maelstrom.

Lesson Three: Hope! Yes, very little is more inspiring than hope. Which motivates an employee more: a well considered, thoughtful, detailed plan that avoids most and addresses nearly all upcoming challenges or hope? Hope, of course! Moving to a new building? Hope all the furniture will fit in the truck you ordered. Need to double your factory output? Hope that the machines can be pushed harder without breaking. Got a big deadline approaching? Hope everything gets done on time. When used liberally and frequently enough hope is one of the greatest inspirational tools you can share. Hopefully it works for you.

Lesson Five: Fear. Few things inspire a person like fear. Fear of losing a job. Fear of being publicly shamed. Fear of fear. Never miss an opportunity to inspire a little fear in your employees. Do you think an impala is afraid of a lion? Of course it is. Do you think fear of a lion inspires the impala to run just a little faster than all the other impalas? Most certainly. Now imagine if that impala out ran the lion only to get called out in a meeting for not achieving quarterly sales targets. Our friendly impala is now afraid of being eaten by the lion and getting laughed at by all the other impalas! Talk about inspiration. Fear will inspire your employees like little else can.

What happened to Lesson Four? Nothing! That’s right, one of the most inspiring things an employee can receive from you is nothing. That will have your employees reaching, searching, and grasping their own nuggets trying to find inspiration. Sometimes inspiration is like jazz, it’s about the inspiring things you don’t say, so don’t say anything at all. End of the year push coming up? Nothing. Saturday evening rush at a restaurant? Nada. New product launch? Zilch. If you feel you must do something then motivational posters, offensive coffee mugs and quirky screen savers should more than suffice.

Remember, with every move you make and every breath you take they are watching you. So breath deep and release the mighty wind to lift them up. You are their hero, you are the wind beneath their wings.